When the Day Returns

[Suji]

"A bum who lived in a really nice house..." Suji's eyes flicked over to him, arching an eyebrow. Imagining Drake living in the lap of luxury didn't come easily. Honestly, imagining any of them living in luxury was difficult. They ran around half-clothed in whatever skin-tight attire they could find, and tended to live in abandoned houses, hotels, and churches like a bunch of college-aged squatters.

The more she thought about it, the more the idea grew on her. Laziness wasn't really a quality Suji could say she admired, and especially not before the war, when her sense of ambition was reaching its peak. But the image of him rolling out of bed in the afternoon, doing normal things (with however much procrastination), and just generally being taken care of, was nice.

Suji laughed under her breath. "I didn't know what I wanted to be..." She looked back over to him with a smirk. "But I knew I wanted to be the best at it." Shifting her weight a bit, she went on. "My parents were both lawyers. They were pretty fiercely independent, but they were good parents. Did all the necessary soccer practice and music lessons and everything. I'm sure they did the 'play classical music to your baby' thing too."

It was strange to talk about her parents, and she realized that it was actually the most she'd done it probably since highschool was an actual thing. "I don't know. I guess I would have been a lawyer too. And had the perfectly structured life with time for family and friends and coworkers all penciled in at the appropriate times." She didn't sound bitter about it, but she didn't sound particularly nostalgic either. As if realizing that she was rambling, Suji smiled up at him.

"Our lives would have been pretty boring, huh?"

[Drake]

Drake watched her as she talked, and tried to hide his smile when she claimed she would have been a lawyer. He didn't succeed very well. He just couldn't imagine her standing around in a courtroom for some reason. Oh, she would probably make an excellent lawyer. But Suji in a business suit? That was just unnatural.

"I guess you could say they would have been boring. Especially compared to all this." He gestured to the alien equipment in the room around them. "Buuut, I don't think I would mind. Then or now. Excitement is over rated."

Drake stood up and stretched then, arching his back and raising his arms toward the ceiling. Then a thought occurred to him. "Oh yeah, I just realized I haven't asked you yet. What have you been up to since we both left Vegas? I never heard which faction you got transfered to."

[Suji]

Suji smiled to herself as she watched him stretch. It struck her that if she were a braver person, she might consider surprising him with a hug. Sure, Suji wasn't a coward by any measure, but fighting aliens took a certain (very different) kind of courage. Instead she settled for looking over at him, until mid-stretch, he asked her a question that she'd been dreading.

Tensing, Suji looked away. Her heart rate picked up. Well you see, Drake, while you were narrowly escaping death, I was throwing back homemade beer on a tropical coastline. Even if he wasn't upset or bothered by it, she was. Part of her understood that it had been necessary -- hell, whatever was left of the Vegas and Dallas factions would have probably agreed, from the state of her. But it still seemed so indulgent, weak.

"I didn't go to a faction," Suji replied slowly but honestly. She straightened, subconsciously moved away from him. "I was sent to a free human camp." Her index finger traced against the desktop, and she looked down at her hands. The shame wasn't heavy in her voice (she made sure of that) but a shade of it lingered. "I taught at a school there. A lot of younger kids, but some of them the same age we were when everything got bad."

After biting at her lip, she added: "Cassie sent me there to recover. I suppose it worked," Suji finished weakly, without looking up.

[Drake]

Drake was surprised that Suji hadn't been sent to a faction, but when she said she was sent to a free human camp, it made sense. Free humans needed to be protected just as much as controlled ones needed to be attacked. And Suji would make a great guard.

But then she said she was teaching, and that confused Drake a little. Did she mean that she went there specifically to tach? Or maybe it was just a hobby she had taken up.

Finally, Suji revealed that Cassie had sent her there to recover, and Drake furrowed his brow as he gazed upon her. "Oh." He couldn't think of what else to say. He knew that Suji had been pretty messed up after the whole Dallas incident, but apparently he still didn't know just how messed up.

So while Drake had been practically living off the land trying to find the Cape Town Yeerk Peace Movement and Resident faction leader, only to have the entire city destroyed when he did, Suji was off in some secure area teaching kids their times tables while she recovered? Drake did not know how to react to that.

"I think... How could... What..." Words were eluding him. Such a mix of emotions were swirling around inside him, trying to sort themselves out. The suddenly it hit him. It was so obvious now.

"I... I think I'm jealous."

[Suji]

"I think... How could... What..." Suji steeled herself against flinching. Her heart was thudding away, practically in her throat, and she felt more than a little nauseas. It hadn't been this bad with Aubrey; mostly because Aubrey had needed a bit of a break too. Of course, she just stayed in New York though, with an actual faction.

When Drake said that he was jealous, she shot him a cautionary glance, trying to see his expression. He didn't seem mad, or even really disappointed, at least not yet. The latter was what she'd been fearing the most. "Yeah." Suji looked down again. "You have every right to be. It was a resort vacation compared to everything in Dallas and Vegas."

Quickly she looked up at him, eyes wide. "You should go. You know, just talk to Cassie about it. Maybe not the same place, but, I'm sure-" Suji stopped, as if suddenly realizing that she was supporting him up and leaving the war. Something that she'd look down on most people for doing, and something that she was still struggling to forgive herself for. Even still, she wanted him to go. The idea of being separated without any communication again pulled roughly at her heartstrings, but it'd been safe and everything had been so easy. He deserved it.

We all deserve it, She thought to herself, already knowing what Cassie would say. It's not about deserving it, it's about needing it. And Suji didn't know that Drake did. She didn't want Drake to have to need that place like she had. "On second thought, maybe not." Suji rubbed the back of her neck. "You're made of stronger stuff than I am, you know that? Than a lot of us are."

[Drake]

Suji was trying to be supportive, Drake knew that. But it wasn't making him feel better. If anything it was making him feel worse. Going on "vacation" just because Suji had gotten to was not as appealing as it should have been. It wasn't that Drake didn't want a vacation, because he did. But he knew that it wasn't the right move. It would have been frivolous to send Drake away.

"On second thought, maybe not. You're made of stronger stuff than I am, you know that? Than a lot of us are."

"Heh, I don't think so Suji," he said without humor. "There is no way I'm stronger than you. You are made of steel and I'm made of silly putty. You can punch holes through me really easily, except they fill back in. You? You can take punches all day long without hardly getting a dent." But it is harder to straighten yourself back out when you do get dented, Drake wanted to say. However, he kept his mouth shut. She didn't need to hear that.

"No, I'm not strong. Not by a long shot. I just never get weaker." Drake sat back down on the desk and ran a hand through his hair. His seemingly innocent question had backfired. Instead of discovering where Suji had been, it seemed he had found out where he had been himself. And it wasn't very encouraging.

[Suji]

Suji listened to him, and had to bite back the protests that instantly began to fill her mind. It wouldn't help anyone for her to argue with him about it, even though that was certainly what her instinct was. He looked pained, and not just my-bird-neck-is-broken or an-laser-beam-burned-my-side pain. This distress she felt now wasn't as sharp as it was in those types of situations, but it went deeper, gnawing at her insides. She would have been stupid to expect the war not to weigh on him, but part of her really, really wanted to believe it wouldn't. People like Suji did the things they did so people like Drake shouldn't have to feel like this. Right?

Well that's only totally condescending. You're what, the Guardian Angel anti-hero who shoulders all the bad stuff and thereby protects everyone else? You wish. And yeah, she did wish. It sure would have beat watching Drake go through this.

She put a hand on his knee. "And not getting weaker isn't a type of strength?" Suji asked gently. "You bend so you don't break, and you don't compromise what matters. You can pick yourself back up when it gets ugly. You probably don't want to hear this, but if you want an example... think about Dallas. I had to be sent away to play teacher, Aubrey was railroaded into minor missions in New York, Fin disappeared, Aida disappeared. You? You went to a new faction. You didn't run away, or hide, or take a break."

Suji tried to smile at him, hoping beyond hope that she was saying something he needed to hear, or that he'd at least take some of it to heart. "You really are the strongest person I know."

[Drake]

Drake still wasn't convinced. Not completely anyway. But he could see her side of the story and could see why she felt the way she did. Knowing that she viewed him in such a positive light was encouraging, even if it did make him feel slightly uncomfortable.

He smiled. "Thanks Suji. Not saying I agree with you, but thanks. You are the strongest person I know too." It may have sounded like a corny and generic response, but it was true.

He let everything soak in for a moment before standing up once again. "I'm glad we had this talk, Suji. It really helped to clear out my head. Still, I think it's time we stop sulking in a dark and empty classroom." Drake started walking over to where he thought the lights would be and hoped Suji wouldn't mind the drastic change of atmosphere.

[Suji]

Suji backed away when he stood. "I don't know," she replied dryly. "I'm pretty good at sulking." And she'd even had some recent practice doing it in dark and empty classrooms. She braced herself for the lights to come back up, and when they did, it took a moment for her to stop squinting.

Before she could hold it in, Suji began to yawn. Even though she fought to keep it small, it was a losing battle, and she ended up covering her mouth for at good handful on seconds. Her eyes watered blearily and she rubbed at them, hoping she didn't look half as drained as she felt. Dim lighting was good for hiding that, and she had a feeling she looked like a zombie when the real lights came on.

"I think I need to sleep for like twenty hours. Unless you, um, had some kind of adventure planned." Something about her tone suggested that she was a bit wary when it came to Drake and adventures. After the experiences of what happened with storm drains and bouncing balls, a Blade Ship provided way too many opportunities for disaster. She knew she could use the rest, but part her was almost unwilling to let him out of her sight again so soon.

[Drake]

Drake had to hold back a laugh as he meandered back toward Suji. "No, no adventures. I think I have had enough adventures on my way here. No need to add any more to my list."

"And sleep sounds like a good idea. You should definitely do that if you are tired. It sounds like we may be busy later, so a little rest would do us all some good." If the Cassie was actually on the premises, it was no small deal. Drake had yet to meet the woman in person despite having been an animorph for so long.

Drake held out an elbow for Suji to wrap an arm around if she wanted to. "Would you like me to escort you to your room? You know, assuming I don't get us lost."

[Suji]

Suji glanced at his arm for a moment, then laughed under her breath as she took it. "I would love it." When they left the room, she turned the lights back off. As they walked down the quiet hallways, maybe Suji thought she knew a quicker turn or two (she kept close track of the guide lights), but she didn't point it out. As tired as she admittedly was, she wasn't in a big rush.

Eventually though, she was standing in front of the room she was currently sharing with Aubrey. Seiya had wanted to put them in separate rooms, but on short notice, they'd have had to been bunked with the recruits. They'd both preferred to just stay together.

Pulling her arm gently from Drake's, she turned towards him. She tried to think of something to say, but everything light seemed to get caught in her throat, and she'd just be repeating another I'm so glad you're okay. Because neither seemed quite right, Suji raised up on her toes and wrapped her arms around his neck in a close hug. Before letting go, she said softly: "If you need anything, I'll be right here."

[Drake]

Drake tried his best to navigate the blade ship and eventually reached his destination. For only having been there for a little while, he wasn't having as much trouble navigating around the place as he would have expected. But now that he was here, he was a bit sad that it hadn't taken longer. He hadn't seen Suji in so long and now he was already saying goodnight. Or at least, he was about to when Suji surprised him.

His eyes when wide in surprise as Suji reached up and hugged him around the neck. He wasn't expecting that. He would kick himself later when he realized it, but he was so taken off guard that he forgot to hug her back. He just stood there like a statue.

Then when she let go, she topped it off by saying, "If you need anything, I'll be right here." A warm smile melted the surprise on his face.

Drake placed a hand gently on Suji's shoulder. He didn't say anything, but he gave her a definitive nod. He would take her up on her offer if the need ever arose.

Then he let his arm slide off her shoulder as he began to move down the hall. After a couple steps he turned his head back and said, "Goodnight Suji. I'll see you when the day returns." And then he walked away.